Wedding Gifts: How Much Should You Really Spend?

The joys of weddings: You get to see one of your friends or family members tie the knot on their big special day. But not without a cost; attending a wedding isn't cheap, there are so many expenses you've got to consider, from outfits to accommodation. And most importantly, the gift.

Deciding how much to give for a wedding gift can be tricky. It depends on several factors, such as how close you are to the couple, and even then, you might still feel unsure. But don’t stress too much about it; we’re here to answer all those burning wedding gift questions you have in this guide!

Considerations When Giving a Wedding Gift

With something like a wedding gift, it will look a little different for everyone. Guests fall into different camps in terms of closeness, and that's perfectly fine; your gift amount doesn’t have to be the same as someone else’s. After all, it would be a bit awkward if you gave your brother less than his neighbor, right?

But relationship isn't the only thing you have to factor in. Let's go through some important considerations when giving a wedding gift.

Your Current Financial Situation

You don’t want your wedding gift to come across as too stingy, but it’s also important to consider your own financial situation. Choose an amount that fits your budget rather than feeling pressured to match what others are giving. Remember, you’re not in a competition; the bride and groom invited you because they want you there, not for your gift (at least, that’s the case for most couples).

What’s Culturally Acceptable

In certain religions and cultures, wedding gift etiquette may look different. The traditions you’re familiar with may not be the same in another culture, so it's a good idea to do some research beforehand, especially if you're attending a wedding for a couple from another background.

The Amount Others Are Giving

People will certainly base their gift amounts on factors beyond what others are giving, but there's no harm in asking a few people in your circle to get an idea of the typical range. At weddings where a few of your other friends are attending, just ask them their plans for gifts. You might even agree that you all give the same, so nobody looks bad for giving less.

Figuring Out an Appropriate Wedding Gift Amount

Instead of leaving you stressed out trying to figure out the right amount to put in your wedding gift, we've put together some example figures to help guide you.

Close family members or friends: $150 to $200 or more

Anyone who's in the bridal party: $150 to $200 or more

Somebody you work with: $100

Distant family members or friends: $50 to $100

Attending the Wedding With Someone? Here’s What to Know

Not all people will be attending a wedding on their own; maybe they're going with their partner or have been given a plus one take along a friend. This is where things get confusing; there's an extra person, so you'll want to throw a few extra dollars into the card to cover the costs of having them there. There's by no means a written word that says this, but it's more of a principle.

Generally, you should try to double the amount on the card if someone else is coming with you to the wedding. Some people might only want to contribute 1.5 times the amount instead; that's completely up to you.

What’s the ‘Covering the Plate’ Theory?

If you've been to a wedding before, no doubt you've heard of the 'covering the plate' theory. It has long been used to describe the amount you give in a wedding card to match what the newlyweds spent on hosting you for the meal, as they had to cover the cost themselves.

Now, this theory has some holes before you take it at face value. It's not like you're going to ask the bride and groom how much they've spent on the meal; that would be seriously rude, so you would have to take a wild guess yourself instead.

How About if You Can’t Make the Wedding, Do You Still Give a Gift?

Not being able to attend a friend's wedding is disappointing, but that doesn't mean you're off the hook when it comes to giving a gift.

Regardless of whether you can be there in person, it's still thoughtful to send a gift, even if it's not the same amount you would give if you were attending.

So, how much should you give? While, again, relationships will be a big price-determining factor in all of this, around $50 to $100 should be a fair amount if you're close to them. If you're not as close, $50 should be fine. However, some people may suggest not giving anything if you don't have a massive relationship with the couple; that's your call.

Financial Tips for Helping You Choose the Right Wedding Gift Amount

Stick to cash gifts: Nowadays, most people give cash-based gifts for weddings. While you might want to give a physical present too, make sure the main focus is the cash amount as it's what's socially acceptable.

Consider group gifts: If a handful of your friends are invited to the same wedding, giving a group gift could be a great idea. This especially works well with a few employees who work at the same company, as it keeps everyone on the same level.

Avoid asking the couple any questions: It's understandable to get inside the bride and groom's heads with things related to gifts, but this can come off as rude. If you have any questions, it's best to discuss them with a bridal party member instead.

The Bottom Line: How Much Is Appropriate to Spend?

As you've seen, several factors will influence the appropriate amount to give in a wedding card. A good rule of thumb is that if you're close to the couple or part of the bridal party, you can expect to spend between $150 and $200 per person. For those who are less close, a range of $50 to $100, or even a bit more, would be perfectly acceptable.